Chinese hospitality is one of the great gifts of travelling here — warm, generous, and built on centuries of practice. A few small gestures go a long way.
How to receive, how to reciprocate.
Chinese hospitality (好客) is built on the idea that a guest is a gift. When you are welcomed, you are welcomed warmly — with tea, with food, often with a small ceremony. The appropriate response is to receive gracefully, to compliment the host sincerely, and to bring a small gift if invited to a home.
The unwritten rules are not many, but they matter. A few of them follow; the most important one is to be present. Chinese hosts notice when a guest is genuinely interested — and they reward it with extraordinary generosity.
A short list to travel with.
Tipping is not customary in mainland China. A 10–15% service charge is sometimes added in upscale restaurants. In a casual setting, leaving a tip can cause confusion or even embarrassment.
Do not stick chopsticks upright in a bowl of rice — it is associated with funeral incense. Do not tap the bowl with chopsticks. Pass food to the plate of an elder first.
If invited to a home, bring fruit, good tea, or a small token from your country. Avoid clocks, umbrellas, and green hats as gifts — all have unlucky associations. Red and gold wrapping is welcome.
Receive and present with two hands, examine briefly, and place carefully in a card holder. A small bow of the head as you receive is appreciated.
A few notes for the days themselves.
Arrive a day early if you can. The first day of a retreat is rarely the most restful — the body is still in transit. An extra night at the hotel or at the venue itself makes the first morning of practice much quieter.
Bring a small notebook. Most guests find that the days between sessions are the ones that yield the longest-lasting insights. Writing a few lines each evening is the simplest, most powerful practice we know.
Curious about a particular situation? Send us the question — we will tell you how to handle it with grace.